musings and reflections of hollyholz

2010-11-25T00:25:00.002-05:00

my mom greeted me with a question when i came home tonight. she asked me what i thought of the iphone because she wanted one for herself.

i can't believe my mom wanted an iphone before i requested for one.

she also asked how one could check email and go on the internet with the iphone. i told her people need a data plan in order to email and go on the internet. she then proceeded to ask me how to get a data plan, and whether you can buy one like a modem.

that was the shocker of the hour.

2010-11-01T23:33:00.001-04:00

i need to fall in love with a fruit or two. any suggestion?

2010-10-14T00:12:00.001-04:00

lately, i'm being reminded of what it means to have joy. only with joy can you truly be thankful of what surrounds you - even in the toughest and unfavourable situations.

:)

2010-10-07T22:29:00.002-04:00

recently, i've had experiences where i've pretty much had to duke it out with the people closest to me. and the awesome thing is, as painful as it is to go through an argument or a "honest talk" which involves being frank (not "tom", haha... to jl, that is)... the end of it results in a really awesome feeling of knowing that the friendship/relationship between the person and myself is authentic and genuine. instead of assuming things or having to guess what's going on in the other party's head, it's an epiphany to me to know what the person is thinking (and vice versa).

though some wounds heal from confrontations, while others don't... both come to the same conclusion - that it reveals the truth of where things stand, rather than painting a picture which isn't necessarily accurate.

the summary of what's been happening this past week.

2010-10-06T22:47:00.002-04:00

i think i can finally use the birthday present (or was it Christmas) that Ben got me a few years ago. He bought me a moleskine notebook along with a Chinese cookbook, asking me to journal all the dishes and meals he'd make for me. so far, i haven't had any journal entries, though i think i should include the ones he made in tofino and other random odd times.

what sparked this sudden usage of the gift?

he was persistent in making dinner at home tonight rather than going out on the whim. and so we had some good home cookin'. :)

ah, things to be thankful for. must continue to remind myself of the blessings especially in tough and challenging times.

2010-10-03T17:28:00.002-04:00

oh, beautiful british columbia... how i miss thee.

the mountains.
the ocean.
the kayaking.
the hiking.
the random japanese food trucks parked by the bus station in richmond.
the gelato shoppes.
the friends and fam.
the tea and coffee cafes.
the other food places.
the trees.

wish i was there right now. wish i could rewind to two weeks back, as ben and i were enroute to tofino.

2010-10-02T17:56:00.003-04:00

perhaps seeing a few of my closer friends from ntcbc today made me a bit nostalgic... and led me here to this blog. after all, this blog did connect me with a lot of people during my university years from all walks of life - as the old bloggers shared bits and pieces of their lives and thoughts, and vice versa. one of these old bloggers got married today (congrats to abby and raymond!).

i realize i do miss sharing my thoughts. regardless of whether or not an audience is there, i think i'm going to resume blogging... just to go back to the reason this blog was created: to share what's on my mind with those that are the dearest to me (but are far away physically... due to school back then, and maybe now, just due to the different walks of life).

so thought of the day? friendships and community

a strong friendship and fellowship isn't just created because it's "convenient". intentional effort has to be put into it, in efforts to grow and nourish into something awesome. it was great seeing the nt friends - some of which i only see at weddings. i realize it's nice to catch up in depth, even for that short time, because of the intentional effort put forth in the past... that establishes a common trust. but in attempt to make it something even more fruitful going forward, both parties have to put time and effort into making it something even more. like nevin said "lunch? just let me know when and i'll make time for you"

simple, yet profound.

though it's convenient just to see each other at people's weddings and other significant moments in life, it takes intentional effort to keep a good friendship going. with that, i appreciated nevin's offer to meet up for lunch, and reminded myself of the fact a good friendship requires effort to maintain it. i agree there is a certain chemistry or level of comfort that naturally flows in a friendship, but to make that friendship even better, effort is required.

similarly, in our respective circles and communities (church, recreational, etc.) - i find we often times come together because something's conveniently available. this could be a volleyball/ultimate frisbee team, a gathering at someone's house, an event like buskerfest, etc. but once that available thing disappears, so does the circles and communities, if intentional effort to build or grow it is absent from each person in the circle.

taking this thought to the next level is Christian community, where i realize if it's there's a healthy Christian community, it isn't just based on our intentional efforts... but the community having its foundation on Him. that way, if human efforts fail - which may happen - then there's still a cornerstone that keeps things together, that is Christ alone. with that, grace and love is there to remind us to once again, make an effort to rebuild things with purpose and intention.

it's a lovely day in the neighbourhood...

2010-04-27T23:25:00.000-04:00

this weekend made me realize how much I appreciate my neighbourhood - let it be for my own personal running and biking adventures, or for getting together with our t3c neighbours closeby.

i have been thinking about making the best of the neighbourhood i've grown up in (and still reside)... thanks to ben's neighbour who kindly introduced himself to us a few weeks ago. mind you, he has this rare trait as most people these days would keep to themselves and their homes, but he has inspired me to become more of a neighbour to those in my community, and appreciate my neighbourhood more... let it be for building nearby coworkers and t3cers up (surprisingly there's quite a few nearby!), or simply building rapport with people you see occassionally just to offer a smile and hello...

haha first step might be to buy a bbq and have one : ) (i dare not use the one at home that's been sitting idle for 10 plus years)

2010-04-24T19:22:00.001-04:00

i finally ventured out to my grandma's nearby timmy's after a 5 month hiatus (as she was out of town...), to chat over coffee and other unhealthy things (though I was still able to boycott the items i refuse to have at timmy's due to my personal vendetta)

though it was a really good and enjoyable conversation with minimal nagging (and questions relating to the future :p), our conversation made me realize I am actually not as family oriented as I thought I was. I mean, I am close with my immediate family of 3 plus grandma... But other than that, I realize I actually do a poor job in keeping in touch with my relatives, and in caring for them. Not only that, but I realize it isn't a natural gift of mine to be the family connector, as I realize I have become ingrained in the things nearby me over the past few years. (Which is a good and bad thing, as I am continually learning not to stretch myself thin, though at the expense of slowly becoming a hermit)

ahh, the things I learn everyday. I guess its time to get onto those emails and facebook messages...

2010-04-18T23:01:00.002-04:00

double impact volleyball tourney
chirashi take out (talk about deja vu!)
sunday service with old friends from nt

what a nice way to spend 2day :)

and what a better way to end it by having tomorrow off!

2010-03-01T17:20:00.002-05:00

i am reminded today that time passes by really quickly. it's hard to believe that five years has passed by already... and i still miss him a lot.

perhaps he's the reason why i still drink timmy's to this very day.

2009-10-24T21:48:00.002-04:00

since i started working downtown two and a bit years ago, i've had the opportunity to bump into a lot of people from my past - let it be from junior high, university, ntcbc, old teams, etc.

i had one of the most memorable "bump ins" with someone from my past this week, and also the most interesting rush to the GO train station to catch my train. who made it so interesting? jon ng, a friend from my high school days.

mind you, it wasn't the first time i've bumped into him. in fact, i've bumped into him in exactly the same spot before - while we were crossing the north side of bay street at front, with me going west, and him going east. both times i was literally running for my train, with less than five minutes to go.

the first time, we just waved hello and goodbye... this past thursday, being the second time, he surprised me out of the blue. just like the first time, we yelled and waved hello and goodbye. as i was looking out for oncoming traffic, to attempt to jaywalk, all the sudden i hear "hey - i'm going to follow you this time until you get to your platform!" i turned around and saw jon. after asking if he was sure and him nodding, i said "i'm going to jaywalk - you ready?"

i didn't expect him to come with me, but he did! in two minutes time, we asked of each other's whereabouts, and i updated him on my two month sabbatical. i must say, it was quite a memorable. and now, as i promised him while entering the "paid fare" zone... i'll message him to arrange for a proper catch up time.

2009-10-05T22:50:00.003-04:00

i've only been at work for 3 days (with a wkend in between) but it feels like i've been back for 3 weeks. however, not complaining. it's good to have routine back to a certain degree. and to be catapulted back into reality.

2009-09-30T17:42:00.002-04:00

apparently, per ryan seacrest, yesterday was national coffee day.

i didn't know that.

as such, i concluded i am no longer a coffee addict as many people once concluded. speaking of which, i didn't even have my coffee today! however, once tomorrow comes, perhaps that may all change and my conclusion may be wrong.

2009-09-28T00:48:00.002-04:00

it's been a while since i've stayed at home/around home for an entire day after church, with the intention of doing so. (with the exception of being sick)

it's also been a while since i've moseyed around the family room, watching a movie at 3pm in the afternoon on a sunday, rather than going up and about.

however, the restful part of the day didn't come with the movie. in fact, i felt a bit restless, as it seemed like i wasn't doing anything that was value added. it came when ben and i finished the movie, and stepped out of the house to return the dvd and to also go for a coffee. our convo in the BEN86 (aka his car, as the neighbourhood starbucks was at full capacity, like usual) was one of the refreshing convos we've had about life and our friends recently.

so what did i learn?

i can't simply rest by doing absolutely nothing. for me, rest is being in a relaxing environment but at the same time, being reflective and of course, being in great company of friends and coffee.

2009-09-23T17:41:00.003-04:00

you would've thought with a two month break, i would've started blogging from the getgo. but with a week left in my break, i decided to start blogging just now. haha :) (sorta)

but before i forget, i thought yesterday night was something that's worth noting for memory's sake.

i finally signed the waiver and team sheet for dynamite rolls. we're finally "playing at the same level". haha :)

who's we, you ask?

ben and myself.

what are dynamite rolls, you ask?

it's the volleyball team started by ben. it took us three years to finally play on the same team in the outtahand league. the first year, i was rejected because "we don't play on the same level". the second year, i decided to stick with my original team to continue working out the chemistry of the team. finally, this year, i was told "i made it on the team".

haha. oh ben.

2009-04-22T20:36:00.006-04:00

A Year and a Half in Review

(FYI - this was in my draft folder for half a month, as I've been slaving away at work for the personal tax season up until last Thursday... hence the delay in updating you all)

After such a long hiatus, I contemplated whether or not to provide an update on the past year and a half given that most of you who stumble across my blog (who are my intended readers) are those that have been in touch with me from afar. But I suppose to give some context for the blog entries to come and for the purposes of reflecting the past year and a bit (since I've had trouble answering Evie's question on "what were some eventful moments and achievements in your 25 years of existence" on the eve of my 26th birthday a while back), it doesn't hurt going back in time for a bit. Was kinda inspired from Clinton's old blog entry too, actually, where he chronologically noted the things he did since graduating from university.
So here goes…:

Oct 2007: Decide to commit to serving as a counsellor for the university group at T3C (Genesis)
Oct 2007: Go to Israel for a trip :)
Dec 2007: Had my first ever all-nighter at work. Put it this way - I've never thought timbits were that bad until that one night.
Dec 2007: Hosted Christmas party for the "orhpans" in Toronto :) big cooking feast
March/April 2008: Attended the funeral of someone who kept up with my blog for the longest time (while I was still in school), and who I looked up to a lot; a man who I can say truly ran the race and fought the fight as per II Tim 4:6-8 - Uncle Roson
April 2008: A year-long friendship w/ a guy named Ben that was not-so-healthy (and affirmed my thoughts a purely platonic friendship is non-existent and impossible) surprisingly became a long-term relationship. :) Who would've thought Japanese take-out could result in something...
May 2008: Cooked my first steak ever
June 2008: Rode 200km from Toronto to Hamilton over two days for the Ride to Conquer Cancer
July 2008: Tore my achilles, and skipped out playing Cornerstone Ultimate for the 2nd year in a row.
July 2008: I think my pseudo Nghiem family moved out west to Brampton... :( *sob*
August 2008: Went to NYC - went cafe and hot dog searching for the entire weekend, saw Rent, watched a Yankees game in the old stadium, and drank more coffee/tea.
August 2008: Went to Vancouver/Seattle/Portland to spend some quality father/daughter time with dad over many cups of coffee and tea.
October 2008: Attempted to cook my first turkey, but needed desparate assistance from Vicky and Benjai Wong. However, I had many satisfied coworkers and friends! One of the few communal meals hosted by yours truly
November 2008: Planned the first baby shower for Jimmy and Tracy - don't ask me why, but I chose to do one that was HUGE as an initial project. Thankfully it went smooth and was under $450 for 40 people! Note to self - never plan a baby shower if it falls the day right after a 3-part bday bash which you're also the planner of.
November 2008: Went to HK for a wedding and China (Zhong Shan) for the first time ever with my grandma and mom; first (and possibly last) trip together with the three generations...
February 2009: Finally picked up rock climbing (indoor) and committed to buying climbing gear, after a year of contemplating whether or not to invest into it. going with my climbing partner/old uni friend/coworker/friend Ivy :)
February 2009: Was given a homecooked meal by someone who doesn't cook at all, right before watching Jersey Boys :)
April 2009: Actually touched personal taxes for work as a CA; first time in 4 years. Nearly went crazy during the month of April.
May 2009: Sporting Life 10K again - under one hour! :) Got to run with a few old friends again - Evie, Fi, and Wallace

2008 - with the exception of a one or two things (which I'm extremely thankful for!) - was relatively normal... perhaps 2009 will be one filled with adventures and activities. It already started with two running events, a planned meal chez moi's, and the big bike ride coming up again. Perhaps I'll bring a bit of 2007 back into the picture and plan for some road trips ahead :)

2009-04-19T00:55:00.002-04:00

i've had many reminders today of how quickly time passes... for instance:

- conversing with Elianna in complete and comprehensive sentences - that was the first for me!
- seeing Gabriel as a big baby :) - now that he's already 8 months!
- training for my third sporting life 10K now... though it only seems like yesterday when i first picked up running
- reaping the benefits presently from buying a certain someone shinobu takeout a year ago from yesterday

what reminders to cherish every passing moment, given each moment passes by rather quickly.

2009-04-14T23:24:00.003-04:00

so i have some things planned out, though some are definitely more spontaneous than others:

- i am niagara bound again! :) riding 200k once again from toronto -> hamilton -> niagara.
- i am attempting to play ultimate again hopefully for most of the season rather than just two games. i have quite a dismal history with ultimate, given i only played 1 - 2 games / season in the past year. playing w/ my friend ivy (aka go) and possibly another w/ the cornerstone league once again.
- sideline cheerleading w/ softball :) that's definitely a sport that i have not come to love when it comes to playing, but one that i'd definitely be around and watch

things that are still in consideration:
- 24 hour challenge at albion hills
- beach volleyball? (i love playing court though)
- trip? (but where?!)

2009-04-07T23:09:00.002-04:00

the unknown

in my recent conversations with several people, i've come to realize this year is quite different from the ones before. how?

there are so many uncertainties.

for those of you who know me well, you know i'm a planner - i generally have a rough idea of what i want to do, plan ahead (i.e. i would normally have my summer sports scheduled planned out, an idea of what to do or when/where to go for vacation, things i want to achieve with a game plan to get there, etc.) normally by now, i would've determined what i'd be doing or where i'm going this summer.

this summer is quite different. i have no sports plans (yet) and to top that, i have no idea when and if i'm taking a vacation. my future is quite uncertain in a variety of ways as well - i'm dwelling on ministry directions in and out of T3C, wondering if there is anything to do (if i am able to do anything) with these crazy ideas of mine that seem near impossible, and where determining where my passions and desires lead me.

but my friend jenn reminds me this is a good thing. why? this is when i have to force myself to step back, break, and rely on His strength and guidance to see where He leads. and perhaps this forces me to slow down and take things one step at a time.

2009-04-05T01:24:00.002-04:00

LOVE/hate - this is the new balance

new balance's newest ad campaign accurately depicts my feelings towards running. i picked up running a few years back, but it's a constant love/hate relationship. this morning's experience reminded me of why i love the sport so much, though there's always the dreaded question of "why am i doing this?" before i hit the pavement.

saturday morning (04/04/09) marked the official start to my running season, as evie and i headed down to high park for the 8k and 5k run respectively (i missed out on the 8k cos it was too late, and had to go for the 5k). however, with wind chills so great that it caused the yonge/dundas intersection to close temporarily, i asked myself what was i thinking in signing up for an early april race. i could have benefitted from sleeping in or going to the 'one of a kind show'. on top of that, because i had to wait for an hour before my race started (since evie's started at 10 and mine at 11:15), i was standing outdoors for a good hour before i started running.

however, these doubts soon dissapated when my race begin. it had a frazzled start, since ev and i couldn't find each other after her race and before mine..., i decided to finally bag check and start the race but the gun had already went off. next thing i knew, as i was starting my race, i heard "holly!!!!"... and there i saw ev. before i knew it, the girl was running with me (since i had missed the crowd) and she ran 13K :). despite my dismal results, it was still a great run - with great scenery comparable to the seawall at stanley park (haha), great company, and great loot to bring home!

this run made me realize why i love the sport so much...:
- running at these events isn't just about the race. it's the pre race hoopla, the race itself, and the post-race festivities... like sampling noodles and getting healthier snacks, bumping into your significant others' coworkers, seeing other coworkers that also ran, and quality brunch/fuel up time post-race.
- it's good for the heart (though not for the knee) and the body
- i've built many great friendships over this sport - namely with evie, but it reminds me of my early days at T3C doing the running group w/ people
- it's a sport that forces me to reflect and think about other things while running (to keep myself going and not focusing on how tired i am or how far i've ran), and provides an opportunity for me to be outdoors!
- running is not an individual sport - it's rather communal despite contrary belief. whenever you go to these races, you see groups of friends/family running together, strangers with a common passion for running chatting with each other, and supporting friends cheering on the side lines. while i was waiting for evie, i unintentionally became her photographer, following her at the start, mid-point, and finish line!

all in all - a great morning and reinforcement of why i run.

2009-04-02T23:53:00.002-04:00

mush

yes. that's the bestword i can think of to describe the state of my brain. you see, my challenge for the past few weeks has been to spend at least some time during the day to reflect on the things happening in my life and what God has been trying to tell me - intentionally (as opposed to a mere thought or sudden epiphany while running).

however, my mind has been racing for the past while on various thoughts - job, ministry, friends, family, future... at a pace so quick that i can't even gather the various thoughts or summarize anything. i'm simply touching the tip of the iceberg in every aspect. perhaps i'm also lacking the energy to... and am just simply getting by.

i think i need a vacation. or a break from the every day routine. it's been a while.

2009-03-31T00:24:00.003-04:00

it's a beautiful day...

... or at least it will be one on September 17, 2009 - rain or shine. i'm finally going to a U2 concert! :) wahoo. it's been a while since i've had to sit in front of a computer clicking refresh every 30 seconds, in attempt to purchase concert tickets.

yes, not exactly the most thought provoking blog entry, but something to share. the little excitements in my life to keep me going through busy season.

2009-03-29T22:43:00.002-04:00

the comeback...

i've contemplated on whether or not to revive this blog for the longest time. after realizing how much time i've spent thinking about it, i put my foot down and decided to do so...

i've realized in the past year and a half that time really does fly by. i look back at my blog entries from years ago (more than 7 in fact!) and realize how much less i've reflected on the things happening in my life or the thoughts that go in and out of my head. perhaps it comes with the age where the memory starts to fade day by day, but i find myself having trouble remembering things happening a week ago... and forgetting the thoughts and ideas brewing in my head.

i've also come to the point of realization that i don't have as much time these days to keep in touch with everyone, to let them know what's going on in my life and what has been inspiring me (or letting down). as this is the original intent of my blog, since i started this in university when all my friends were out of town for school, perhaps it will once again acts as a means of inviting you, my friends, back into my world. (not that there has been a lot going on, as you will probably come to realize with further entries) and perhaps it will compensate a little (but definitely not completely) for me being MIA from time to time.

so i'm back. stay tuned. :)

2007-11-21T00:40:00.000-05:00

I keep telling myself to go to bed early - yet I am still online at this hour.

But I can't complain. This is the first time in a long while that I've gotten home straight from work at a decent hour (i.e. 7:30), run (it felt soooo good to run outside), commence cleaning the never ending mess in my room, start catching up with my emails from months ago, and eating dinner at home.

:)

2007-11-06T00:43:00.000-05:00

It's been 3 months since I last posted - this is truly the longest hiatus I've ever had on this blog.

A lot can happen in 3 months... while some things seem to be changing at the speed of light, other things remain the same. It's funny, however, that sometimes I'd like things to stay the way they are with the former scenarios while with the latter, I'd like things to change (for better or for worse). I'm learning though, that God places us in each circumstances for a reason although I quite haven't figured out (and may not until years later) why, especially ones that have been lingering for quite some time.

Anyway, jet lagged-ness has prompted me to post, as I feel like I have just pulled an all-nighter and can't quite sleep anymore. I just returned from a two-week trip in the Middle East, focusing on Israel while spending two days in Jordan and a day in Egypt. It's definitely been an awesome trip - getting to know new friends (most of them are my parents' age, if not older), climbing and nearly tripping off mountains (literally), and walking through historic biblical sites. I took well over 1,000 pictures - all of them are not presently with me though, as my trusty tripmate Andrew has them all on his portable 120 GB photo drive.

This fall's crazy slew of activities also contributed to my absence on this blog. This is the first year since I started working a few years back that I could commit to other activities outside of work - ministry, personal interests, etc. I think I overestimated the free time I had though. Here's the typical schedule (after work hours, that is):

Monday - baking classes at George Brown College
Tuesday - Volleyball
Wednesday - Volleyball
Thursday - OFF :)
Friday - small group (Sept/Oct); Genesis fellowship (Nov/Dec)

I also have to fit in studying for an exam somewhere in between... heh. Not so good in terms of my packed schedule. But, despite the busy-ness of things, Iam enjoying what I've been doing for the past while.

Anyway I should attempt to sleep as tomorrow is my first day back at work since two weeks ago. Hopefully my next blog will be much sooner than 3 months from now. After all, Ihave a handful of baking stories, trip stories, and other things to share.

Thanks for reading :)

2007-07-26T23:52:00.000-04:00

After chatting w/ Myles last week, I realise I have forgotten to count my blessings. I remember sometime a year and a half ago, I had attempted to blog on a daily what I was "currently thankful for" (ha - one of my many failed attempts on making this blog full of substance and depth). I kept at it for a while... but eventually stopped blogging about them. At least I could still easily remember things to be thankful and praiseworthy of. However, I've gotten to the point where I take things for granted so easily... and have forgotten how to say "thanks" for the big and especially small things in life.

I shall make another attempt - perhaps this will be a remedy to my current state of cynicism and crankiness. Also, maybe it'll help make things a little less "holly" centered and more focused on the giver of my blessings and those who contributed to those awesome moments. So here goes...

I am currently thankful for: West end friends who have offered their homes to me to stay in two nights in a row... and keep me well fed - with great food and awesome conversations.

2007-07-20T13:04:00.001-04:00

I think as each month passes by, I realize I'm becoming older and more senile :) Also easily irritable... I wonder why that is. As I ponder more, I notice a lot of the annoyances I come across deal with people being inconsiderate or oblivious to their surroundings. Say, on the GO Train, I find it irritating when people talk loud or on their cell phones for the entire train ride. As if I desire to be concerned about their kids' soccer games or the fact you can't manage your portfolio properly. Another scenario would be driving, especially when a slower driver hogs the passing lane.

Hmm... I wonder what is stirring this disturbance in me...

2007-07-12T23:57:00.001-04:00

i think i need to hide in my home for a day. just one day.

2007-06-09T08:15:00.000-04:00

A Mid Year Review

I've recently picked up reading Courage and Calling by Gordon Smith, a book I purchased at Urbana. While the book discusses the importance of recognizing what your vocation/calling is, it also highlights many points that I've been pondering about as of late, such as being intentional, which I'll save for another time. In the meantime, I know it's been long due since I've last given a blog update... Given the book emphasizes on the importance of self-discovery (for the purpose of knowing who God has created you to be) and learning to live both retrospectively and presently, plus the fact it's been half a year since I probably wrote anything to update you on my well-being, it's about time for a mid-year review of Holz's life.

The first half of 2007 has treated me well - lots of ups and some minor downs - but I've come to reflect and learn more about who God has made me to be in the past six months (although this will be a continuous journey). Through the big things in life such as career, to the small - yet extremely imporant - things in life such as friendships, I can certainly see that He has his timing for a lot of things... and I should presently be waiting presently for his direction in ministry, life, and other things.

In the work aspect of life, I am currently out of audit!!! I made the switch into a tax group in our downtown location... so I am now located in the downtown core, with my own desk and what not. (yes, no more hotelling stations!!! I never had a permanent desk during my tenure in audit) It's awesome to be working with my old audit teammates that have made the move to tax prior to my arrival. I've also bumped into a lot of people now that I commute on the GO and mosey around the downtown PATH, including some from my old church. I also enjoy the hour long commute, as it gives me an opportunity to read and nap :)

Onto other news, I am currently injured and out-of-commission from running and playing volleyball, due to an overuse injury from running. I ran my first 10K (the sporting life 10K) and didn't take time to rest subsequent to the race, resulting in a mild shin splint. I promised my physio friend I would rest after our volleyball tourney last weekend + the Becel Ride for Heart, which I did... I miss sports. I'm also giving Ultimate a chance... although w/ my injury I have not been able to play.

In terms of ministry, it's awesome to see how God has slowly provided opportunities for me to integrate into the T3C community - through serving on the worship team, my small group, the Oasis Cafe ministry, Summer Conference, and potentially other areas that may involve counselling and mentorship. Considering I came to T3C only knowing one person, it's really goes to show how God leads once I took that leap of faith.

Family life has been quite interesting as of late - as the months pass, I realize how the dynamics are changing. Instead of me ditching my parents for friends, recently it's been the other way around. :)

In other parts of my life, my foodie interest is slowly getting back in gear - I've had the wonderful opportunity to get to know my friend Jenn a lot this past year. We both share the love for food, although I argue that she definitely has more of the love than I do... because of her, I finally got a chance to try Sushi Kaji!!! (I've been ranting and raving about it since 2005) Look out for future entries for our love of food.... :D Baking has been the same, as of late... but I did manage to cook a decent meal for Jenn and Mils a few weeks ago. :) Looking forward to taking courses in the near future w/ Jenn... we'll see.

I realize I can only go so far in telling you what's been happening - as I'm typing all this out, I realize how busy life is. I guess the challenge for the latter half of 2007 is to learn to be still and take time out to absorb and reflect every opportunity, situation, and blessing that has been bestowed on me... and to discern what there is to learn from all of the above.

Stay tuned for more adventures ahead.

2007-05-27T23:54:00.000-04:00

More Starbucks Adventures for You

Here are several signs/situations that indicate I frequent Starbucks too much for my own good:

1. I recently went to the North York Centre Starbucks (across from Empress) where I don't visit very often because I don't work or live near there. However, I went there for lunch one day, and saw two baristas whom I knew from other Starbucks locations... that work there permanently. So, being welcomed at a Starbucks that I rarely visit was kind of shocking to me, to say the least.

2. Befriending Starbucks baristas at more than one location - in addition to the Bayvew/7 location, I now know of a few baristas at the Warden/Steeles location... :) So now when I walk in, they actually greet me by name. This happened as the barista that I befriended said "you always order that drink... would you like to try the soy misto w/ this...?"

3. Being able to order several drinks that aren't on the menu. London Fog, mistos, versions of americanos, etc. :)

4. Perks!

My next big challenge is not to get suckered into the Starbucks craziness downtown... as I will be heading south to the heart of the financial district in a few days to start w/ another group at the Firm. We'll see how that goes.

2007-05-06T22:26:00.000-04:00

i ran my first 10K today.

woo hoo!

and here are the results too!

2007-04-23T22:27:00.000-04:00

Ah... it has been a long hiatus. What have I been up to?

1) Summer Planning Galore. It's that time of the year, where everyone including myself is making plans for the summer. I'm still debating where to go this summer, what to do, what sports I want to get involve or continue with, etc. The concrete plans so far: running (Sporting Life 10K!), some sort of volleyball, ultimate... yeah. Photography is also one of them, as I have to make use of the things I've been bestowed with. Oh, and trips! So many things to think about.

2) Orillia. Back to that Client of mines that I've been on since my first year. I always miss the town when I'm done, but rarely enjoy my stays up north due to the nature of the job. Love the hospitality, the people, but just the fact it's for work makes it bad.

3) Room. It's slowly being cleaned. I've only delayed this for a year and a half. :)

Anyway... time for bed. :)

2007-04-10T00:14:00.000-04:00

Starbucks.

People say I'm an addict to Starbucks & their coffee. Some say I should work there (I want to!). But very few people wonder why I enjoy Starbucks a lot... and why I often insist on going there. Considering the fact I'm currently on a coffee hiatus, it's not because of their coffee. They have very good, but extremely strong, coffee... and awesome espresso based drinks, but no, it's not because of their beverage selection. It's also not about the brand either. If I was going for coffee by myself (on the go, that is) and there was a timmy's and starbucks side by side, I'd opt for timmy's.

So what is it that makes me insistent on going to Starbucks (and thus causing you to believe I am a Starbucks addict?)?

It's the memories and friendships I've built up at various Starbucks all throughout these years - with people and on my own. Now, I'm not even talking about Starbucks in Toronto, but around the world - in the US, Japan, HK... yeah. The list is quite long, but I'll list a few experiences here just for starters:

- UofT years - caught up w/ friends during breaks in between classes at the Starbucks on Bloor
- Starbucks at the Shibuya crossing while catching up w/ my Aunt
- Catching up with Vicky over a green tea frappucino in Hong Kong by Causeway Bay on our first trip abroad together in 2004... and the many more conversations at the Starbucks at Bathurst & Steeles near her home
- Meeting Ada at the Starbucks at Hwy 7 & Bayview, who (re)introduced me to Mils... with whom I started going to T3C with.
- Studying for the UFE at Starbucks with my study buddies or solo - long, yet somewhat memorable days
- Hanging out with my younger cousin(s) at Starbucks in Lake Genova, Wisconsin and also in Steveston, BC - very rarely do I get to hang out with them... and have conversations.
- Pouring my heart out to my older cousin Lousila at Starbucks in HK & in BC
- Long conversations with the bestests at Starbucks, especially when Clary was still in Nunavut, and we would always go to Starbucks when she was in town.
- Mo getting me a Caramel Macchiato for my birthday - he hates Starbucks (the smell of it, the establishment itself, etc.), but was willing to get me one just for my special day... which was very much appreciated as it reminded me of what great friends him and Caro are to me
- the Starbucks Sunday School - this to me is still a surprise, as it simply began with one simple question proposed to Clinton: "I'm going to Starbucks - want to come?"; from there, it grew from one person to 9 people at one point in time... heh.
- quiet moments at Starbucks - reflecting lots...
- simply seeking some relaxing moments at Starbucks in HK Metroplaza (my only source of the South China Morning Post)
- Starbucking w/ Anita right after the CIBC Run for the Cure... ah, the conversations w/ her :)
- Starbucking w/ Evie in HK in TST... after a long LONG afternoon of shopping :) but simply fellowshipping with her.

Wow. The more I think, the more moments I recall. This is just a short list too! Soo... perhaps this now tells you why I love Starbucks? :) I'm up for a Starbucks w/ you if you are up for one :D

BTW - just a FYI - if you bring a tumbler to Starbucks on April 22nd, you get a free coffee (it's for earth day)... :)

2007-04-09T23:59:00.000-04:00

my mind just came to a blank. there were things to blog about, but alas, it must be the old age. maybe it's the lack of caffeine in my system. i mean, it's only day 11 of my coffee-withdrawal experiment. because i can't think of anything of substance to blog about at this moment, i'll just leave you with some things that are running through my head as of late:

- summer vacation plans - where to?! (believe it or not, i'm thinking south...)
- summer plans for sports - what to join?
- where is God guiding me and leading me with the circumstances and situations He has placed in my life?
- my April looks jam packed... : when's a good time for jazz night?!
- thankful for friends - friends & tea are great combos... esp w/ friends you haven't seen in ages (i.e. the dork that i wanna be like - anita!)

speaking of friends... now i remember what i wanted to blog about! :D :) :D i'll save it for a separate post that is to come shortly.

2007-04-08T23:58:00.000-04:00

It's been an interesting weekend - with ups and downs. It's been a while since I've wanted to stay home on a Saturday night and do nothing (but to watch a movie) - but that didn't happen. However, it was still a lazy Saturday as I took an afternoon nap (which is extremely rare...) and slept for 9 hours :) Today was totally the opposite, as we had volleyball training at T3C + the T3C running crew started running again...

My dad's been awesome in ensuring I'm somewhat afloat and on top of things, despite the ups and downs I've been experiencing. He has reminded me to constantly think of Philippians 4:8. It has kept me going this past week, so I'll end off the post with this: "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

2007-04-02T23:36:00.000-04:00

a few questions:

- how/where can i get rid of my old textbooks (that may not even be used anymore in schools)?
- who wants lotion? i've got H20, bath and body works, and other lovely ones that i can't quite use due to my migraines but must clear out of my room

i'm trying to clean my room - a mere attempt though. it's a mess. it's been a mess for the past year and a half.

2007-03-25T21:46:00.000-04:00

A Passion Revived... :)

Seeing how this is late night post, you can probably guess this passion isn't anything of great substance or depth, but it is still a passion nonetheless: being a foodie. Now, I don't proclaim to be an expert of any sort. I don't think I'll ever be able to be a food critique or what not... seeing how I can even barely fend for myself when it comes to cooking and what not. However, I do enjoy trying good and interesting restaurants... so, like my friend Jenn suggested, here's a list of places I want to try in the next few months (or realistically, years, seeing how this interest, like most of my other ones, isn't exactly the cost-sensitive hobby/interest):

1) Sushi Kaji: if you have kept up w/ my blog in the past two years, I've probably mentioned this several times in passing... I'm sloly recruiting people to come with!
2) Bymark: their rating has been fairly consistent in the past few years... so I'd like to give it a try - heard a LOT of good things about it!
3) Perigee: at the distillery district - my friend Mo went and said the dessert is to die for. I wanna go!!
4) Solo Sushi: Now, I'm not sure of the exact name of this place, but it's a Japanese place in Newmarket, Omakase style. Yummy :)
5) Langdon Hall: Looks fancy schmancy though... but great reviews!
6) Cava Restaurant: A reasonably priced tapas bar with good ratings from martiniboys.com... the menu looks really unique too!
7) Terra Restaurant: So close to home... a gem that's hidden in Thornhill, actually - they started having a tapas bar.

Anyway... to be updated; but for now, it's time for BED.... unfortunately, toiling in the kitchen for the night has brought semi-successful results. While I can now proudly say I can make some sort of hummus (edamame hummus to be exact), my green tea biscottis still don't look edible... not very one bit. Anyway, good night!

2007-03-15T22:49:00.000-04:00

my friend sent me this - http://starbuckseverywhere.net/Toronto.htm :) hehe... let's see how many i've been to that's listed here.

2007-03-11T23:45:00.000-04:00

feeling a bit frustrated - i think i was more mature three years ago compared to now. i feel like a high schooler... (now, if only i had march break off, then that wouldn't be a problem!) in every possible way.

i think i am being cornered again, going back to the basics of surrendering.

2007-03-09T00:16:00.000-05:00

the baking haitus is over. i broke out the nutella.

:)

2007-03-08T00:55:00.000-05:00

randomness

- i was apparently a target during tonight's game, and i had some hard hits, but i'm still loving the game. :)
- facebook is extremely addictive. what makes it different from friendster though? (haven't figured that out yet...)
- i always tell myself to sleep early when i wake up in the morning; yet, i never learn... like now.
- still figuring where to go for vacation this year, and for how long. where to... where to... the land of the kiwis?
- learning to do things on my own this year... - i'm growing up :D
- finally taking kat out for dinner this weekend.... so i'm only half a year late for her belated birthday celebration...
- i need more sleep
- time simply flies by - i'm back in Oh-Really-Ah next week for two weeks.... my third year back at this client.
- roll up the rim - losing terribly - 15 cups consummed 3 wins 12 losses. i wonder why i can't save money.
- sleeeeeeep. a precious commodity.

2007-03-01T00:08:00.000-05:00

ignorance is bliss.... but at the same time, i'm thankful for being in the know as well.

2007-02-28T00:21:00.000-05:00

The Tale of a Dork-to-be

So... as promised, here is the low down on my dorky weekend. Not as hilarious as Anita's tales, but still, pretty laughable. Here goes:

Having only a few hours of sleep on Saturday morning(as I attempted to clear all my work to have a relatively work-free wkend), I realised I had forgotten my password for my work computer, as I had changed it at 1am in the morning, and thus, had forgotten what I had changed it to. So I call IT, and here goes the conversation.

H: Hi. Um... I changed my password sometime around midnight.. and somehow forgot the password.
IT: Uh, I can't reset it for you... you have to be on the network
H; But how am I going to get on the network if I forgot my password.
IT: Try this - dial in using the phone, since you only need your passcode... then I'll reset your password.
H: Okay... hold on. [Holly proceeds to unplug one of the two phone jacks that's on the wall... and hooks up the laptop. A few minutes later, she gets through]
H: I got through! [Silence. Holly thinks to herself, "the IT guy must've put me on hold"]
Three minutes later...
H: Hello? [suddenly looks at the phone jack...] OH CRAP.... I hung up on the guy.
[Holly calls again to IT]
H: Yeah... sorry I hung up on you.
IT: It's okay... [IT guy sounds absolutely thrilled] so yeah, your password has changed.... so try logging in again now.
H: Okay, I have to redial in since I unplugged the modem... hold on. [Holly unplugs the other line on the 2nd jack, and attempts to dial in via modem... ]
H: Um... I'm trying to dial in, but I can't. No dial tone.
IT: Mam, you're talking to me....
H: Oh. Heh. Heh. Silly me. Let me call you back on the cell phone. [Holly tries looking for the IT number but can't find it... as she somehow has misplaced it through this frenzy]
H: Um... I know this sounds really silly, but I don't have your number. I simply pressed redial to call you. Do you mind giving it to me?

At this point, I'm in utter embarassment and the guy is thinking to himself what kind of dorks my firm hires. :) But, what matters is, I got my password back, and I'm back in action.

The second dorky story happens hours later, when I go to my optical shop w/ these new contacts of mine, unopened from its original packaging. Why? Cos I was soooo brilliant, in that I forgot them in the car when I picked them up weeks ago, and they froze. I thawed them, but my optician laughed at me when I brought them in (as my mother and Fiona advised me not to wear them) and kindly replaced the pair for me.

There. It's probably funnier said than written... but you get the gist. I need to sleep... :P otherwise, there will be more dorkisms coming along your way. Bonne Soir.

2007-02-26T22:53:00.000-05:00

Reflections: Day 4-6

I shall postpone the stories of Holz's dorkisms for another day. While sharing w/ Karen at Starbucks during our Starbucks Sunday School hour, I realized I have yet to blog about the latter part of my short, but thought-provoking, trip to the Orient.

I am reminded how much I dislike shopping - or rather, how much shopping tires me out. After spending two hours in an export outlet w/ Fiona's mom and Evie on day 4, I was yearning to go anywhere but a mall. Yet, the ironic thing is, on day 5, I was reminded an extremely important lesson - if something was meant to be yours, and if it's w/n His will for you, it will be within your grasp and you will get it somehow. It's a matter of time, patience, and discernment. More importantly, don't settle for anything less or anything else unless if there's a clear sign/prompting from God that it's time to move on. How did this come about?

It's from my search for the pair of Puma shoes. While Andrew and I were shopping in Mong Kok, I saw a pair of Pumas I really wanted. However, they didn't have my size. So, I searched for them at several more stores at Langham Place, but to my disappointment, they weren't to be found anywhere. After the family dinner, I went to Mong Kong's Fa Yuen Street, where there were two blocks of stores solely devoted to sneakers/runners/etc. I spent two hours looking for the pair of shoes. I found the pair at several stores, but again, not for my feet. As I was frustrated... and unsatisfied that I was leaving empty handed. So I settled for another pair at the end. It was decent, pleasing at that moment... but just a few days ago, while cleaning my room, I thought to myself "what was I thinking?!" Probably the lack of energy, water, and accountability from friends/fam (i.e. their opinions) triggered my impulsive purchase.

Believe it or not, this lesson is an extremely great reminder, especially for my current yearnings and desires. However, I learned something while writing this too - it's all His timing... but we have to learn to listen.

On a lighter note, the last three days of the trip was spent with family, catching up w/ Evie (ah, Starbucks... and shopping), Gladys (thanks for lunch, btw!), fobbatizing myself in big and small ways (I somehow always purchase a staple fob item each time I go back), and eating to my heart's delight. :P I am so paying for it right now though. I also found out I have a cousin that's waaaaaay older than me. He's actually a step-cousin, but yeah. I shall share a picture later. I also found out I had an aunt that I never met.

I spent day 6 on the plane... and in YVR - Vancouver! :) It was a relaxing day, spent w/ my grandma, Uncle John, and Aunt Lidia.... and to my surprise, I had a nice enjoyable Starbucks time w/ my cousin too. :) However, I was also dazed for the great part of the day, while adjusting to jet-lag. I miss Vancouver - good sushi, nature, everything.

Anyway... time to sign off, as tomorrow is another new day, learning about gas, hedging, and all that fun stuff.

2007-02-25T23:18:00.000-05:00

A Dorky Weekend

I had an extremely dorky weekend - however, it will take me a while to blog so we'll leave that for another day. In the meantime, I am thankful for a relatively decent, although simultaneously eye-opening/wake-up call-type-of-weekend:

- going back to high school days of vball drils. love them! (but i am extremely sore)
- today's sermon - a broken worshipper
- birthday surprises & celebrations & spending time w/ a great community of friends
- catching up w/ one of the best friends and her sis
- a reminder of what priorities are

Praying for a slightly more peaceful week than the last.

2007-02-19T21:08:00.000-05:00

i want to hide under my covers and not come out for a long long long long long time.

in fact, i am hiding. just not in my covers yet. will... do... so... now.

(fyi - it's work related... so not to worry anyone, although i've already scared someone. haha...)

2007-02-13T18:39:00.000-05:00

Reflections - Day 1 to 3

It's 7:45am on the 14th. I've only been here for two and a half days, but it feels like I've been here for a long while. I haven't been able to sleep much or sleep well, waking up at 5am for the past three days. I suppose my sleeping pattern is left much to be undesired for, as I averaged 4 hours of sleep the two weeks prior to coming to HK.

Yes, I'm currently in Hong Kong, as my previous posts have already hinted. The primary purpose of this trip is to bid a final farewell to my grandmother, who had passed away almost a month ago. My trip here has been a rushed one right from the get go, from the moment I purchased the plane ticket online in my hotel room in Houston. However, God has been paving ways in making this trip possible. Being granted a week off during the black out period at work is definitely the big thing, as it is one of the busiest months in the assurance practices of any accounting firm. The fact I made it to the wake on time is also something to be thankful for, as my plane landed here in on Sunday night at 7pm as scheduled (my dad came to HK a week earlier on the same flight, which was delayed by several hours...), the night of my grandma's viewing and in time to hear my father share his sentiments and thoughts about my grandma.

So my reflections of the past few days? Here goes:

- Funerals in HK are definitely not peaceful. Not only are they rushed, loud, noisy, and rather disorganized, but they do not encourage or hint at any point in time the fact we should remember the dead. Yes, we should pay respects by bowing and in action (i.e. sitting there) but nothing more. I was not a happy camper in this respect, to say the very least.

- Death brings the family closer together - I experienced this during my grandfather's death two years ago, and two years later, my thoughts remain the same. I'm thankful for the chance to bond and spend time w/ my cousins... in the past, since I always visited during the busy work week, I wouldn't have the chance to spend time with them given that they have to work. With the funeral, it gave all of us some time away from work, hence more time to spend with each other.

- Time is a gift - something I have not had for a long while. I don't get to venture out frequently, except to a client location... I am very thankful. I've had a chance to do some long delayed reading, catching up on long delayed emails (for ministry purposes and following up w/ Urbana commitments), listen to music, do some research for things I'm actually interested in, and spend time with family! Unfortunately, I also had some time to go on facebook (I finally joined - as I was told there is a primary school reunion of some sort - and there is!!! I can't believe I'm this close to reliving my days at Emily Carr PS) and I can totally see why the site is addictive.

- I'm wonderfully blessed with two things - an awesome family and great friends. My family is not perfect (far from it - on both my mom's and my dad's side), with lots of quirks, disagreements, and interesting relationships; it definitely makes life a little more interesting and constantly reminds me not to take any relationship w/n the family for granted. As for friends, having been able to meet up with old friends at different points this week, I realize I am blessed with friends from the past (such as Rosie, whom I've known for 10 years...) and present. Also, I was sent away with a friendly ride on Kat Lok's airport shuttle and a much appreciated late night coffee run from a friend (as I was working late into the night at the office a few hours prior to taking off from YYZ). I really can't ask for more. Even at the present moment, I'm blessed with a conversation with the kid that's almost like my brother (as I knew of his existence before he was even born...), as he is hearing me out with some dilemma of mine.

Anyway, I'm off to the Island side to meet up w/ Evie... and to be a courier of some sort for her beloved :) More reflections to come.

2007-02-13T12:55:00.000-05:00

"we love because He first loved us"

With all the massive advertising here in HK for valentine's day gifts and what not, it is extremely easy for one to become bitter, especially those who have been single for a long while :) however, I am reminded greatly that really, the greatest love of all is His love... and by that, we should exercise the love bestowed to us by Him and His grace. With that said, Happy Valentine's Day - may your love for your significant others, family, and friends alike shine :)

2007-02-12T12:05:00.000-05:00

thankful for good friends :) and for a superb early morning shuttle to the airport at 5am - thanks Kat!

(yes, both of us pulled an all nighter, hence my squinted eyes)

lots to share w/ much time to reflect and ponder. lots to give praise for as well. however, need to sleep too... so we'll save that for another day.

ttfn!

2007-02-06T00:10:00.000-05:00

trying to love my job, trying to love my job, trying to love my job...

did anyone see the GM commercial during the superbowl last night? (the Canadian GM one) i feel like the robotic arm. funny thing is, my client's production line looks almost exactly like it, since they make parts for those cars. ahhhh...

2007-02-04T18:05:00.000-05:00

"Count your blessings instead of sheep...

... one of my favourite Diana Krall songs. So true in every sense. Despite the downs at work this past week, I have many blessings to count... for which I'm thankful for:

- rennovations at home. put it this way, I will admit to being spoiled, hands down
- reminders of the fact He has crafted each situation and experience to draw me closer to Him and to learn more about myself & His will/direction in my life
- strawberry dipped chocolates in Indy from my Superfriends
- Starbucks run(s) w/ awesome sisters in Christ after service
- "therapy" group at work, which includes late night dinners on Saturday night
- great conversations in the car
- emails
- prayer group w/ Ina & Anita
- informal conversations w/ dad
- getting a ride from a big sis from the airport
- brunch at Cora's w/ S&S
- calls from friends while being afar... (even if it means discussing how to assess a variance...)
- an upcoming week to reflect and restore
- exciting ministries and initiatives at church

There are many more... but i must sleep as i have a long drive ahead of me tomorrow morning. Off to London I go for a week.

Must continue to keep myself focused and levelheaded... so many thoughts, yet patience is a virtue in finding out the answers to the thoughts.

2007-01-29T00:00:00.000-05:00

Still learning how to surrender.

2007-01-14T22:52:00.000-05:00

Need some opinions - do you think Montreal is do-able in a weekend? (i.e. leave late Friday night, come back Sunday?)

2007-01-12T18:37:00.000-05:00

God is Good!!! :)

Urbana sharing is still delayed - it's been a bit busy both on the work and personal front, but I cannot leave today's experience unblogged. Today's chain of emails relate to the thoughts and God's calling at Urbana... moreso a confirmation for both myself and my sister in Christ!

To make a long story short, at Urbana, I sensed God reminding me of the purpose of being at the firm... not so much for my love for auditing but rather for the people I come into contact with. Being at a firm, my exposure to people is quite large - for coworkers and clients alike. It fosters an environment when effective, lives can impact lives in big and small ways. Anyway, at Urbana, I realized the possible need for some sort of common ground for Christian professionals to gather - what a better way than to start at my own workplace, taking baby steps at a time to see where He is leading.

So, since being back, I've taken some time to touch base w/ a few people at the Firm to assess whether they're interested in something like an investigative bible study or a small group of some sort. This morning, while waiting for the client to give me information, I decide to email this girl whom I've met once in December, but have heard a lot about her since we have so many mutual friends. My initial plan was to email her to reintroduce myself, and slowly ask if she's interested in the small group thing when the emails flowed regularly. To my absolute surprise, she responded really quickly, not only to tell me she remembers me, but also emailing to see if I was interested in starting a small group with her for Christian professionals! In a way, she and I were the answers to each of our own prayers :)!

Sooo... we'll be meeting soon - I'm excited to see what He has in store for us!

2007-01-07T23:21:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year! Yes, albeit I'm a week late, I am still wishing you all a wonderful and blessed new year.

A few common topics of discussion amongst different groups of friends as of late include new year resolutions, possible vacation ideas for 2007, and Urbana.

I used to be gung-ho about setting new year resolutions, but after many years of attempt and failures, I have decided it was not longer effective. However, I am a believer of setting goals (and aiming to achieve them)... and included are as follows:
- learn how to use my camera to its full potential
- learn how to cook
- serve consistently in one ministry at t3c
- improve volleyball & running
- consistent devos & learning how to build a strong foundation of Faith

As for vacations, I am still deciding where I should go this year - HK for sure will be on my list as I try to visit my grandma every year... but am unsure as to the timing. There are plenty of wkend trips I want to go on - to NYC, to Montreal, to Vermont, and the list goes on. We'll see...

Urbana 2006 has come and gone. Went on a road trip w/ a few friends from T3C (and the special guest from TCBC) to Chicago and St. Louis. I'm thankful for the opportunity to continue building on friendships and more importantly, to discern where God is leading me and prompting me to grow and minister. I'm also thankful that I had a chance to go with these people, as we've been keeping each other accountable before, during, and after Urbana. I'm excited to see what God has in store for each and everyone of us. This paragraph only describes merely my thoughts and experiences from Urbana, so I'll save a detailed sharing for another time.

Personally, with the new year, I realise I have to count my blessings - especially as I have been catapulated into the peak of the audit busy season. Included are the following:
- Parents: despite my mom going above and beyond for a 24 year old, I am very thankful for them... and their patience and understanding
- Being called "jeh jeh" instead of "Dora" by my Mui :)
- Urbana
- Friends from childhood - Ben, Vicky, etc.
- T3C Small Group and Community: I can't believe it's already been one year since I've been here. I'm integrating slowly into the community, and have built some good bonds with people.

Well the bed beckons me, as I have a long week ahead. Cheers, and take care.

2006-12-10T23:01:00.000-05:00

... things have changed this year.

i have started my Christmas card writing already! this is a nice and early change compared to the previous years, where i started on the 23rd of December. :)

speaking of card writing, my church is really cool. they've encouraged us to write encouragement postcards to each other... and they even gave out postcards for us to write on. that's so cool!!! it's like reliving the josiah & malachi days all over again (my old fellowship at my old church) but in a bigger setting, involving the whole congregation. i'm excited to see how that turns out.

all righty, with holly running on adrenaline rush for the whole day, it's time for bed.

2006-11-13T22:47:00.000-05:00

my best friend is coming home! but that means there's no point in planning a trip to iqaluit anymore.

but she's coming back!

2006-11-06T23:03:00.000-05:00

busy season is here.

how can one tell?
- holly becomes more absent minded, and the short term memory thing is even more prevalent than usual
- holly becomes less active, in many regards - physically, socially, etc.
- holly lacks sleep, regardless of the number of hours slept (am i chronically sleep deprived?)
- holly goes through acne breakouts... in the oddest spots on the face
- holly's dining room becomes the working room

busy season is here, as a checkmark can be made on each of the lines above. that's right, tick and bop it. :)

btw, what inspired this blog was the fact i couldn't remember something i originally wanted to blog about... something of more substance. ah wells, next time! unfortunately, no photo blogs can be made at the present moment as my computer has officially gone ka-put on me. time for a newbie.

speaking of time, it's time to hit the hay.

2006-11-02T20:00:00.000-05:00

TVB & BVB?

Last night, I realised there were two things that could easily pry my mind away from work: TVB and BVB - that is, those really stupid Chinese drama series (TVB) and beach vball.

No matter how unrealistic, cheesy, and even absurd the TVB plots can get, especially during the finale of the series, I find that I can easily immerse myself into those shows... and all is forgotten for that short 40 minute span. In all honesty, it surprises me how the shows can take my mind off of things. Heck, it works.

Onto BVB, it doesn't surprise me at all that the game takes my mind off of work. Given that I've gotten smashed in the face w/ a volleyball (cos the opponent spiked the ball in my face), endure the late night games and drop in, and what not, I still enjoy playing very much so.

I realised that there was another similarity between these two interests of mine. I actually learn a lot from both, as hard as it is to believe with the former interest. Using the recent series I indulged myself in (the Gateux Affairs), I totally have thoughts on how pathetic the main character is in several regards - she's naive in easily trusting people and in throwing a fit over the smallest things. Yet, through her, I can actually see a bit of my personality being reflected... as sad and tough as it is to believe. (especially the daydreaming part, although I can definitely say I don't daydream about walking and running through grassy fields with the person of my interest, if any...)

I am also reminded of how emotions easily determine the outcome of one's work. This actually occured to me while playing BVB; during our second set, we somehow hit a really good run, and we became optimistic about the game - in fact, we won the set considering we were down by 2-8 at the beginning of the set. Similarly, during the show, the main character won the cake competition that she was originally doomed for as she had been told off by her mentor, whom she had a crush on. Her spirits were crushed. However, when the mentor texted her and said he shared similar sentiments (in liking her), she was able to make a comeback. REALLY stupid, but it's so true that emotions and attitude do play a big role in how we get things done.

Anyway, just some rambling thoughts. :) For your benefit, maybe a picture blog will come soon :D.

2006-10-29T23:19:00.000-05:00

a u t h e n t i c i t y.

Our small group discussion on The Big Kahuna (starring Kevin Spacey and Danny De Vito) has made me question many things about myself, particularly in the area of authenticity in my relationships and conversations with friends, family, and acquaintances alike. I have never been a fan of small talk or engaging in conversations for a particular motive. Yet, I question whether there is some ulterior motive in my interactions with people deep inside my thoughts and heart. Do I really converse with people simply for the sake of really wanting to know how they're doing, or is there something else to fulfill some inner desire of mine that even I may not be aware of at that very moment?

Ah, so many questions that are left to be unanswered at the present moment... but to add on to my long list of things to think about.

2006-10-23T23:53:00.000-04:00

Oh - I've been lazy to update my links on top of actually updating this blog. However, I now have a new photo album site that I must actually take advantage of. So please check my new photo site from time to time:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/hollyholz/sets

:)

Ciao!

2006-10-23T23:20:00.000-04:00

Another Delayed Post

As I have been blogging rather infrequently this past year, it makes me wonder who actually still reads this blog. From time to time, I've actually contemplated whether or not to continue with this blog. Considering that I'm rather sentimental and reminiscent of things in the past, and having seen the past four years being chronicled here, I'll keep this going despite the frequency and what not. Hopefully there will still be substance :)

I like posting about my "first" things in life... so here goes:
- First climb up the CN tower took place yesterday: accomplished in 24:25. Considering I had no goals to make it in the speed of light, I'm pretty content. However, next year's expectations will be higher.
- I also received my first parking ticket ever - this happened right after the climb, but it was well-deserved, considering I knew I had a big fat chance of getting this ticket.
- My first engagement as a senior happened last week; albeit a bit stressful as I was assigned a first year w/ no experience to "help" me (it ended up being a mentoring exercise for me more than anything, as I had to guide her through her sections without the help of any prior year examples), it was an interesting experience... but yes, it's hard to believe I'm a senior now.

Lethargy is kicking in. Must sign off... 'til next time, keep smiling!

2006-10-01T23:43:00.000-04:00

mission accomplished

we (anita and i) did it! we ran the 5K this morning for the cibc run for the cure in 25 minutes... w/ only one short 15 second break for water. :) so i can definitely say i ran 5K w/o stopping much. it was really nice to chat w/ anita afterwards too over a nice, well-deserved tall mild soy misto. all in all, it was a nice morning spent in downtown toronto.

so i ran for a cause (or two). it was awesome running with so many people - i think it's a good way to start this running hobby of mine. just hearing so many other footsteps running at the same pace as me was just exhilarating! on a serious note, it was astounding to see how many people ran for a cause - the wall of hope which runners signed was just filled w/ signatures and people writing who they were running for.

you can still sponsor me... just look me up under the toronto location! remember, it's for a great cause :)

2006-09-07T13:09:00.000-04:00

Too much (that I want) to do, too little time

This has been a fun-filled summer, I must say. One of the more memorable and active ones, for sure. A retrospective blog will come at a later date before I digress. Looking ahead, there's still so much I want to do, but I realise as busy season draws near, time to do fun & personal things aside from the important things (i.e. spending quiet time, family time, friends time) will slowly diminish to a near non-existent state. Here's what I've picked up in the past while that I want to continue doing:

1. Baking - biscottis, petite cakes, cookies, pies... so much to make. (also a lot to invest in too)
2. Ice cream making (the Kitchen Aid Ice Cream maker finally befriended me! I made green tea ice cream :) )
3. Be involved in the community - let it be at church, my neighbourhood, a NPO, etc.; however, something may be in the works as I am still praying about it.
4. Beach Vball - played the first game last night after a four month hiatus. I miss it so much! It's good to be back...
5. Outdoor sports - I want to go kiyaking/hiking/something outdoors related and not of the norm once more before the winter hits. Time? I don't know... w/ a business trip to the US in the way, plus a one week visit to HK in the works, not sure if that's possible.
6. Clean my room - it's been left the same way as it has been for the past 9 months; I have made attempts to clean it, but each time, only the area around my desk gets cleaned... and destroyed within a week.
7. Go shopping. I need work clothes pretty badly. And shoes... but what's another few months considering I've been searching for a pair for three years?

Anyway back to work. :)

2006-08-27T21:01:00.000-04:00

"All I want to do is give life to You, and let Your will be done 'til it's all I want to do."

So many desires and wishes in my heart. Yet, may my utmost desire be to give Him all the glory He deserves. Let it be less of me, and more of You, Lord.

2006-08-09T14:28:00.000-04:00

Vancouver - Trip #2 :)

Kayaking is fun... :)
Cycling around Stanley Park is also fun...

Watching fireworks and gazing into the clear skies looking for stars tops it off.

A great trip so far... :), celebrating friendship/fellowship w/ a few from small group and witnessing the marriage of two good friends! Whistler and the Grouse Grind awaits. I've had quite a bit some time to myself during this trip too... so cheers for seeing old and new friends! More importantly, I had some quality reflection time - lots of thoughts conjured in my mind about the present and the future, and how He is a part of all things. Reflections to come.

2006-08-08T20:55:00.000-04:00

I did it!!! I ran 5K w/o stopping... that means I can definitely do the Run for the Cure. That also means you can also be rest assured that I can finish the run and sponsor me. :) Hehehe.

However, the lack of sleep that I've been getting since arriving in YVR (yes, I'm in Vancouver again, vacationing w/ friends and attending a wonderful wedding celebration for two of my good friends), I ran 5K without thinking that I had another 5K to travel before getting back to my uncle's place. Silly me. Regardless, I did it!

In other news, my cousin is also fulfilling a promise he had made six years ago - he's finally treating me to my graduation dinner. Six years ago, he said he would treat me to a nice restarant once I came out of University. Heck, it's been two years since I've walked out of Convocation Hall, but later is definitely better than never :).

2006-07-28T01:36:00.000-04:00

I did it... I signed up for the run. :)

Finally, one of my summer goals are really coming to play :D So, just to warn you, don't be surprised to see me collecting for pledges in the near future. Just a warning months in advance ;).

2006-07-27T00:55:00.000-04:00

Glad to hear everything is okay. The pics above were all taken from Galiano Island, BC. I believe the pictures do the place injustice, as one would have to see it for him/herself. Galiano Island was one of the best parts of the Vancouver/Rockies trip, as I had a chance to relax, run, reflect, and read. Spending time hiking and enjoying the nature w/ my Uncle and Mom also definitely topped the list (as my mom was really relaxed in Galiano as opposed to the other places we visited during the trip). More importantly, just seeing how awesome His creation - the birds of the air, the crabs of the sea, the tall trees, and the rocky shores - I was astounded by what surrounded me in Galiano. Glad there's a cabin that I can return to in the near future!

2006-07-20T00:25:00.000-04:00

Since it'll take time for me to share with you my trip and the excitement that came along with it, I'll sidetrack a bit from the adventure in the West and share with you one of the many thoughts that have been popping in and out of my brain for the past month.

Movies never really leave a lasting impression on me. (For those of you who know me, I'm not a movie buff - I barely watch movies just cos I can't sit still for a long period of time) However, one of the few movies that I remember distinctively is "The Interpreter", staring Nicole Kidman as an interpreter for the UN. What left a mark on my mind isn't the story line itself, but the notebooks that Kidman's character's brother left behind, containing lists of different things in those notebooks.

With so many thoughts that go through my mind (as I am, after all, a thinker), I think it'd be interesting to adopt something like that. In a way, it'd be like a journal or a diary. However, instead of having a chronological day-to-day diary like the ones I've written in as a child, it'd be a diary of random thoughts popping up left right and center on specific topics. Like items I've baked. People I've met. Places travelled. Ongoing characteristics/personalities you look for in a person. Places you want to go. Things you want to do (like rent a moped or skydive - no, not me...). Etc. After all, I AM suffering from short term memory loss frequently these days. What are your thoughts?

We'll see... unfortunately, most of the time I come up with ideas that don't seem to materialize. :) I'll keep you posted.

2006-07-14T02:37:00.000-04:00

Ahhh, Vancouver.

I love this place. The environment, the scenery, the nature, the people... everything.

Somehow, I always take something good and bad from my vacations in Vancouver.

When I was 9 months old, I got really sick here... w/ a high fever.
When I was 21 years old, I went to Stanley Park with my cousin, and because I distract some dude while getting something out of her car, a dude snatched her purse from the car while we went to take pictures of the totem poles. (in fact, go back to May 2004 archives and you'll read what happened in one of the entries)

I'll save this trip's experience for the next entry. Regardless, I'm still thankful for a chance to vacation. Can't complain. :)

2006-07-08T16:28:00.000-04:00

thankful.

:)

cannot ask for more:
- great running time
- good and healthy food
- awesome scenery w/ mountains and oceans
- great family time
- lots of time to read
- in awe of His creation

galiano island is fun :) thanks Uncle John! (let's see how long it'll take for you to find this, given that i haven't blogged in ages)

2006-06-10T21:16:00.000-04:00

I was trying to look for something online.

However, I don't remember what I was trying to look for. So my aimless search resulted in a few finds, including the following:

Summerlicious menu is up!

I'm still trying to figure out what I was looking for. I suppose it's not that important. What did Iget out of this mini-experience? I'm suffering from memory loss big time. I'm getting old. :|

2006-05-31T23:46:00.000-04:00

MIA

Apparently I've been MIA from a lot of things - people, blog, home, etc. Got to a point where Renee had to email me at work just to see if i was okay.

Anyway, I'm still alive... somewhat kicking. My busy season has started again, albeit it will be short lived. I've been suffering from short term memory... with the many thoughts meddling in my head, I can only remember so many of them at this point in time. It includes, but is not limited to, the following:
- my many beefs with certain things in life
- needing to plan for my trip in approximately a month's time (who wants to help?)
- what to do with a gift card i got from work a year ago... should i buy clothes or contribute the money to a kitchen aid ice cream making component?

As you can see, my brain's not filled with too much substance these days. Or not that I can recall. However, just want to leave a mark just to let you know what's in Holz's head at the time being. Must get to bed soon.

2006-05-21T00:45:00.001-04:00

The Adventures of Jess & Holz...

Today's adventure showed both Jess and I how spontanaeity can be fun! All this stemmed from the simple question "what are you doing tomorrow?" during our work emails... I asked with the intention of going for the usual Starbucks adventure, while Jess had something else in mind. She simply suggested an afternoon downtown. Well, an afternoon downtown turned out to be an afternoon + dinner in the different areas of Toronto. We ventured to the the not-so-frequented areas (Queen St W. & Bathurst, the Distillery district) and ended our night at Bayview & Eglinton for a Smalltalk meal. Our afternoon tea at the red box tea house was definitely kick-arse. Must go again!

Tiring day, but definitely fun & memorable. We also found Wage's best friend. (think uglidolls) :)

Next up on our list of adventures - Shoppers Drug Mart. (and trust me, it will definitely be an adventure for yours truly if only you knew why we were going there, and if you know me & my fear of cosmetic products, especially when applied on yours truly.)

2006-05-17T00:34:00.000-04:00

Since I haven't posted pictures in a long while, I thought I'd share with you my baking repetoire to date - in order since this craze of mine began... although some goodies are missing:

Above includes: Chocolate Chip Cookies courtesy of Renee, Brownies, Blueberry Muffins, Jam Drops, Espresso Cake w/ Chocolate icing, & Apple Cinnamon Tea Cake Also in my baking log: Apple Pie, Coconut Macaroons, Maple Syrup Patty Cakes, Lamingtons My challege to date: Macaroons & Merangues :P

My current goal: to make something similar to what my grandmother is enjoying - the three tiered afternoon tea tray w/ those awesome kick-arse sandwiches.

This entry is making me hungry... must go to bed to allow the hunger pangs to subside.

2006-05-16T00:24:00.000-04:00

i'm coming to the realization that i'm a very mean person inside. or at least i'm not as nice as i'd like to be. i think like a mean person...

grrr.

2006-05-12T00:23:00.000-04:00

some food for thought:

"what makes us human is not our mind but our heart, not our ability to think but our ability to love"

- Henri Nouwen

2006-05-10T23:57:00.000-04:00

on my mind...

tonight's conversation with Serena reminded me of how quickly time passes by. with the long weekend coming up, i realise wedding season has officially begun this year! last year's season started off w/ my friend jenn's wedding down by the lake during the long weekend. i was also going crazy that weekend trying to deal a surprise party for mr. raymond onami and attempting to studying for the school of accountancy in the beautiful spring weather. two years ago at this time, vicky and i were moseying in hong kong along lan kwai fong and tst. three years ago at this time, i was starting my third and last summer internship at the insurance company.

sarah's wedding this past weekend also reminded me of how fast the days pass by... i recall the day she called me from the via train coming back to toronto from montreal... in september, the weekend before i wrote the UFE. seeing her walk into the church's sanctuary made me tear up quite a bit. it made me realise how privileged i was to be part of her special day and how we've grown closer especially in the past six years (she was the first person i had lunch w/ at UofT as a frosh!! and we just bumped into each other...)

aside from nostalgia, other things on my mind include my own stubbornness to listen to myself. i've been telling myself to go to sleep early every morning since sunday, as i've been waking up feeling very groggy and regretting the things i had occupied myself with. in fact, like now, i should really be in bed as i had told myself this morning...but i decided to check on my email and blog. last night, out of my insanity, i decided to bake. the night before... i don't even remember.

speaking of remembering things, my memory has deteriorated quite a bit relative to how good i was in remembering names, places, things, etc. before starting work. i have an extremely hard time recalling what i have been up to during the weekend. i've forgotten to pay a credit card bill previously. and names... i don't remember names anymore. i was just gonna blog about something, but i don't remember what exactly it was... so i'll ramble on about my working adventures.

for the past week and a half, i've been working at a client location down in the heart of toronto's financial district - right at yonge & adelaide. and believe me, i can't believe how fascinated i am with this experience, seeing that it's my first time working in the downtown core since starting work. as i told a friend, i feel like a country girl going into the big city - the subway experience, moseying along the PATH, going for the timmy's (tea) or starbucks pickups, etc. funny thing is, it's not like i've never been in the PATH before during the weekday... but being a part of the work force as opposed to a relaxing student somehow makes a difference. and i don't get to enjoy such luxuries at my north york office. :)

anyway... i should really get to bed. more to come next time.

2006-05-09T00:05:00.000-04:00

in need of ideas. fast.

dit moi ("tell me" en francais; using the tad bit that I remember when taking French), any ideas for an interesting & unforgettable mother's day activity that I can do w/ my grandma?

forget about the following: cooking, baking, afternoon tea at a nice place, excursion downtown - i've already done all that with her.

help me...

2006-05-02T23:31:00.000-04:00

my fellow readers,

just out of curiosity - what would you consider as a social butterfly?

2006-04-30T23:00:00.000-04:00

I need a break.

Don't get me wrong - I haven't been extremely busy at work. I've been having some down time at work compared to my peers. Rather, I've been spending a lot of time with my grandma, my small group, old friends, sarah's upcoming wedding, and family.

As a result, the things I've neglected are piling up - the mess in my room, organizing pictures from my digital camera, reconstructing certain lost documents that disappeared when my hard drive crashed, tracking my expenses (which have been and will continue to be a lot), writing snail mail to people, birthday cards to cousins, and most importantly, maintaining a healthy relationship with God.

I need to learn how to prioritize... seriously.

2006-04-26T00:25:00.000-04:00

On the Lighter Side of Things...

... I haven't blogged about my whereabouts for a while, so here goes a light, fluffy blog. So what's new?

- Grandma's back in town for the next while, so it's back to juggling between family, grandma, friends, and work. Thankfully, April's been a slow month at work.
- Talk about an athletic year coming along... volleyball starts tomorrow (for me); I joined the Saints for softball, and doing a running thing w/ a few girls. Oh, and working out on my own too.
- Baking's been a bit slow only cos I've been out a lot lately (i.e. Orillia last week, plus I haven't been home much since coming back). However, look for more goodies on the way!!! (i should post some of my masterpieces, no?)
- Being inspired to pick up mandarin again with Tam. Only cos he says my mandarin sucks. That makes me very ashamed of myself, given that I spent two years in university, and a good decade of Chinese school before that learning mandarin (although I did cheat quite a bit in Chinese school back in the days... before guilt overcame me and I tattletaled on myself to the teacher)
- Having worked for a year and a half, today marked the first day I was really late for work just 'cause... I slept in, couldn't find my glasses, and just decided work could wait. Haha.
- Apparently, I've been told I have some juicy and interesting stories to share... :) however, being the anti-drama queen that I am (because really, the word drama irks me. especially used when referring to relationship and friendship problems. cos really, when one puts things into perspective, the problem on hand isn't really that big of a deal...) I find that the current stage of life that I'm in is quite interesting, although it definitely tests my patience.
- Went shopping voluntarily with Mils on Sunday. Don't know what's gotten into me, but I still have the shopping bug in me. I actually didn't mind shopping w/ Jennifer today after dinner...! Most people would call Jennifer to simply shop, but with me, it's to do anything BUT shop. Haha.
- Trying to plan for a trip that may not even happen. Anyone interested in NYC?
- Learning to realise that I'm growing up... and that not being home much is a very normal thing. Looking back, I haven't really been home much the past four days. Excluding sleeping time, I was home for 1.5 hours on Saturday, 3 hours Sunday, 1 hour Monday, and 1 hour tonight. Not much... I barely see my parents, and I think my dad is still having trouble adjusting to my absence. (oh, which reminds me of a story that I shall share but save for another day)

Anyway, it's time for bed. Maybe a more in depth or interesting post later? I don't want to stroll into work at 9:30am two days in a roll.... haha. :) However, my parents aren't home yet... strange things. 'Nite!

2006-04-17T22:34:00.000-04:00

Similarities - Part I

Recently, I've been noticing a few similarities in the different areas & interests in my life:

- Music: My iPod library is quite vast; I've had people comment that my collection is quite diverse. I agree with that - but I also realise each of the different artists/genres of music that make up my library isn't as... vast. For example, I'd only have one U2 album, or one Gwen Stefani album, one classical music album, one J-pop artist, and one Kayne album. One other thing I noted was that I don't know a lot about the artists or the different artists within each genre that makes up my iPod library.

- Tea: I like tea a lot. I have quite a bit of tea... however, after endless blogs about tea and what not, I realise I don't know my teas that well. I have a bit of different types of tea - roobois, matcha, jasmine pearls, jasmine, oolong, pu-erh, ti kwan yin, monkey picked leaves, bik law chun, earl gray, lady gray, english breakfast, and the list goes on. However, without labels, I probably won't be able to tell some apart from the others, especially some of the Chinese ones like bik law chun and shau mei. In fact, due to busy season, I neglected to label some of the tea I bought and now, they remain nameless to me... (fortunately, it was just three 100g bags... but still :P so much for a connoiseur-wannabe) I still like tea a lot though... and wish I could learn to savour and know the different types of tea more...

- Sports: I've limited myself to playing only badminton, volleyball (court & beach), and possibly softball this season... cos really, if I had all the time in the world, I'd try a lot of them. While conversing with my senior today, she asked me what I played, and I only named badminton and volleyball. She probed a bit more, and out came the list of things I have played or like to play: jogging, tennis, basketball, softball. Truth is, if I could, I'd wanna dragonboat, touch up on tennis, learn hockey, play ultimate (although the cardio would kill me :P), and other sports. However... out of all the things I've listed above, I'm no good at any of them. In fact, I can barely play well on a recreational level for badminton as my friend and I had our arses whopped by this kid and his mom last Tuesday at the Y.

Do you see a common trend yet? This blog is to be continued... as I continue to analyse this trend in the different aspects of my life, outside of my interests.

2006-04-11T23:51:00.000-04:00

current thought: to become nonchalant about the miniscule and nonimportant things in life.

2006-04-07T09:21:00.000-04:00

Parental Units - Part II

I'm actually glad I delayed this post until today... seeing how a conversation with my dad last week made me realize there were more things than I had originally thought that is worth sharing. To make a long story short, he asked me if I knew what a blog was. (Haha, I'm glad no one in the family has spread the word out yet... hahaha) We ended up having a 10 minute argument because of this question... as I told him blog is in essence a "web log". He didn't understand that and I had thought he did. To me, I had thought my explanation was pretty self-explanatory but all he heard was "blog". Looking back, this little 10 minute argument was hilarious but not so during the actual discussion.

I've realized that in the recent years, my dad and I have been bickering more - sometimes moreso than I do with my mother. I do wonder if this has to do with him aging in the recent years. I find that as the years progress, my parent's way of dealing with me have kinda switched - my mom being less picky and my dad being moreso. I must admit, it's a bit hard dealing with this change seeing how my dad used to be so lax about almost everything. How so?

- I went to him first when I began dating... not my mom.
- I confide in him first with my issues before my mom, as he is the more logical one
- I tell him about my aspirations (yes, one of the rare few that i have) - in fact, he's the one who's supporting my dream to become a barista/tea connoiseur of my own whereas mom's telling me to give it up!

But then, this man is the one who has also made me:
- Dread math (I wrote "i hate math" on my homework and agendas while he tutored myself and many other students)
- Maintain a love/hate relationship with badminton
(but now turning to the positives...)
- Focus on what God has instore for me... not what he himself has in store for me. Something I'm extremely thankful is that him and mom have never pressured me to become anything specific, as long as it was something w/n the professional field
- Many marvelous midnite sandwiches when I was a kid (which may explain my current situation.... :P)
- Chauferred me everywhere
- Introducing me to many of my current interests, including photography, hockey, etc.

Come to think of it though, the pros outweight the cons. So... I suppose this blog is a reminder for myself to remember the blessings & good times more than the bickering... besides, w/ him, he forgets things like these easily. :) Yay for dad.

2006-04-03T00:25:00.000-04:00

Since I haven't been posting regularly, and haven't been keeping up w/ my "currently thankful for" endings w/ my blogs, I shall make up for all the times that I've missed out on expressing my gratitude for experiences/things/moments/people/etc. that God has placed in my life:

- this weekend of catching up. definitely tiring, but i spent it w/ people that mean a lot to me. so here's to kensington market/baldwin/yorkville w/ ms RL, dinner w/ two-thirds of my second family, lunching w/ small group & t3c friends, an afternoon w/ vicky, housewarming w/ my friend kathy from work, and catching up w/ clary :)
- an awesome spiritual mentor who really cares about my walk w/ God
- the realization that right now is not the time for me to focus on anything else aside from my relationship w/ Him, family, maintaining and building new friendships w/ people, career. therefore, I'm learning to be content w/ my current situation - where I'm at in terms of work, being single, settling at t3c, living at home, etc.
- a kitchen aid mixer :)
- friends like RL to remind me of the bubble that i currently live in, and that the world and situations that surround us are not as simple as i'd like to think.
- tea4four + a community to laugh and grow with
- U2. their lyrics are just fabulous.
- an opportunity to learn more about myself - my personality, my gifts/talents, etc. learning about myself is a never-ending process.

if I keep on blogging now, I won't be that thankful seeing that I'd be half asleep at work, so i will go to bed... right.... now. :)

2006-03-30T09:13:00.000-05:00

Why do I never ever learn from my previous experiences?

WHY DID I STAY UP AND BAKE LAST NIGHT?! (I came home at 10:30 and somehow, I was not in the right state of mind as I went straight to the kitchen and baked something that didn't turn out as pretty as I expected... but still edible)

I blame it on the Kitchen Aid. But that machine is sooooo.... good :).

All righty, back to work; otherwise, I will not be finished w/ this audit at the rate I'm going.

2006-03-27T00:11:00.000-05:00

Parental Units - Part I

So, having been told on numerous occassions that my parents - particularly my mother - are very interesting and cool people, I decided to blog about them in a two part series. Each series dedicated to them individually. So let's start with my mother.

I don't know about you wackos out there, but what on earth makes you guys think my mom is awesome and cool be hanging out with?!

(I'm just kidding. Kinda. I still think all of you are a little weird though. Please answer the above question, cos really, I don't understand where you're coming from. The comment that Jess made this afternoon about my mom actually inspired me to blog about this... cos she thinks my mom is cool.)

It's hard for me to see my mom from my friend's perspective. Like most kids, I see the sides that you people never can see. :) Like how my mom knows of the right timing to bring up certain topics (i.e. deciding to talk about my love life - or rather lack of one - right after a jack and jill... among other topics and things that I didn't need to know about). Or how my mom loves to remind me multiple times a day to put on moisturizer. Or how she likes to pack my bags for me whenever I go out of town EVEN IF IT IS ALREADY PACKED by yours truly. (although she has been good this time and did not even open my suitcase when I went to OhReallyAh)

I do admit, however, that my mom can be awesome at times... like the whole Kitchen Aid mixer story (which I can share in person to make a long story short). Or when she cooks a nice meal after a long day at work. Or when she brought home a kick-arse convectional oven cos the stove we have doesn't work. Or when we still take time for each other and have an afternoon tea/coffee break at Starbucks or a local Chinese bakery. Or when she's just trying to convince me to relax.

So I suppose she CAN be cool. I suppose...

Next on the hit list: my dad.

2006-03-19T22:30:00.000-05:00

learning (even more)...

... that kitchen aid mixer for kitchen aid is like the iPod for apple computers. You buy the main thing and a gazillion other cool gadgets can be used with it... at a ridiculously expensive price. Still, the mixer is really intriguing and useful, just like my trusty iPod. (yes, a kitchen aid mixer is now sitting somewhere in my kitchen!!!)

... that the taylor-johson temperament analysis is freakishly accurate. so apparently, it's confirmed that i'm a tense, high-strung, apprensive individual that's also very impulsive (i.e. uncontrolled, disorganized, and changeable)... and not to forget that i'm extremely subjective - that is, extremely emotional, illogical, and self-absorbed. do you agree?

... that working has made Holly extremely incapable of tracking time (thanks Karen for the reminder). From the last entry, I meant to say vancouver 2006! tofino might be a possibility. :) can't wait. in fact, it may be vancouver x2. we'll see. must sit down and plan w/ the group soon.

... that i really really really really like vball drills. :D and that i can spike! (yes, my friend kalee has made it a point that i can't say "i can't spike"... and after being drilled by her and some friends during vball, i am able to spike to the end of the court. so no more looking down on the short ppl! :) i miss high school vball.

... how to deal w/ being at work despite the stress and workload that is seemingly impossible to finish. today's sermon was quite a reminder for me: "each one should use whatever gifthe has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ." - 1 Peter 4:10-12 even though i'm still in search of where God wants me to serve in ministry, i know for sure that i can still serve him as written above at the very place he has put me - that is, at work. *ahem, prayer request from yours truly - to keep me accountable to what i've written here*

... the meaning of success, whish is to be saved for another day.

... or should i say, i will be learning tomorrow, that if i don't sleep soon, i'm going to be a zombie at work. that is, if i get there safely, seeing that i'll be up in orillia for another week. so on this note, i bid you adieu until next time. (btw - it's room 303 for those that know what 1-877 orillia means)

2006-03-17T01:00:00.000-05:00

Greetings from Orillia...

... a year passes by quickly. I'm back on my Orillia client for the 2006 audit and so far, it's been busy. Working lots and working late. Unlike last year, I'll be in town for a week and a half. Fortunately I get to go home for the weekend. To get me through this and the remainder of busy season, there are things I am looking forward to, including but not limited to the following:

- Acquiring a Kitchen Aid Mixer. *drool*
- Vancouver/BC 2005... & being a wedding crasher! :)
- Possibly taking a course w/ a few others for cooking/baking?
- Spring & Summer sports/activities
- NYC w/ Jess? Maybe?
- Clary's visit in about a week...!

I just looked at my clock and realized it's almost 1:45am... I think I should head to bed soon.

2006-03-09T00:12:00.000-05:00

So I got tagged by Nev. Seeing how I've had so little time to blog my thoughts, I'll just use this for the time being:

1)Who tagged you?
Nev

2)In what situation did you meet this person?
at NTCBC - when I was in grade 6 or 7.

3)How long have you known this person for?
I think too long. Just kidding... 10+ years.

4)What is so special about this person?
Despite the tough and confident exterior, deep down he's extremely caring and warm... full of deep thoughts. An understanding friend... despite being a man of few words (at times). He's also freakin' hilarious and fun to hang around with. oh, and he bakes WELL :) therefore a jack of all trades. Unlike yours truly.

5)In your heart, what do you think about this person?
I think of him as an awesome brother in Christ... one who listens and is there when needed, especially for spontaneous venting sessions. Like mentioned in #4, he has a big heart for people despite the tough exterior. I wish I could be there for him as he is there for me.

6)At this moment, is there anyone you want to meet? Who?
This is out of no where... haha. At this time? No... not really. I have enough trouble keeping in touch w/ people I know already.

7)Favourite memory?
Many. The Great Panda Adventure. :) (just kidding... I felt so bad for pulling him to watch this incredibly sappy and boring flick back in grade 7) Worship teams. Pulling last minute practices that resulted in an awesome time of worship - The First Noel, 'nuff said.

8)Tag 8 more people
I don't think 8 people read this thing. Or even if they do, they don't blog. Maybe they can email their results hahahaha :) and email tag. (woo hoo, starting chain email at work!) So here goes: Magda, Leslie, Gigi, Kat Lok, Jess, Ray, Mils, Karen-o

2006-03-06T22:45:00.000-05:00

...things i'm learning day by day...

... exercising grace at work with colleages that really don't deserve it but yet, God's reminding me of the grace He has bestowed me with. also learning to bite my tongue while i'm at it.

... what it feels like to be in fellowship w/ bros and sis' just like acts 2:42

... taking a step of faith can lead to big and small joys :)

... how to make apple pie from scratch :D and fortunately, there were enough people to eat it AND not get sick :D

... the joys and challenges of being single - for which i'm extremely thankful for.

... the joy of prayer. it's awesome :)

anyway time for BED :D

2006-02-27T00:31:00.000-05:00

i miss blogging. yet, i can't seem to find the time to do so. :( lots to share, and ramble on about. (nothing juicy though!)

i suppose i'm trying to prioritize things in life... so if i have time, i'd try to catch up with people first before anything. i haven't had time to even catch up w/ karen, who's been back for reading week and is now going back to 'loo. *sigh*

blogging will come.... soon. in the meantime, i'm trying to fix my ipod. it's not turning on. :(

no worries, i had a good wkend. stuff to think about, but happy times indeed. may phil.. 4:11-13 be a light and encouragement to you all this coming week.

2006-02-15T22:31:00.000-05:00

I have had limited access to the internet for the past few days - which is good on my part. :) However, having late nights commence again has kept me pretty much behind on other things in life. Like people's birthday. So here's an entry dedicated to a frequent visitor here - THIS ONE IS FOR YOU MAGDA!!!!! (I remembered! Email me at work sometime? Haha)

All right, time to get ready for bed. Downtown clients are no fun. Lacking sleep. At least I'm a block away from Starbucks, across from a Timmy's, and I can see CCW from where I'm at. Now, only if I had the time to enjoy the place. Not that I'm extremely swamped, but I'm extremely confused with my job. Gaaaaaaaaaaah.

2006-02-08T23:36:00.000-05:00

Thankful for...

It's been a while since I've blogged about things I'm thankful for. Rather, I've been blogging on the fluffier and lighter things in life (not that anything is wrong with that). So, here goes w/ the things I've been thankful for as of late:

- A Smooth Transition
I'm slowly adjusting into a new church community and my small group - to my surprise, I happen to be in the same small group as an old friend from junior high/u of t. I've been challenged spiritually, and am slowly establishing friendships here and there. It's also definitely a leap of faith I've taken that's showing me the different ways God works in all our lives. Continuing to learn more as each day passes...

- Friends who have offered their tummys...
Who have been gracious enough to eat my brownies and cookies, to keep me from eating all of my baked goods... after all, I have to fit into a dress in less than 3 weeks! Seriously, thanks for the feedback! (and Ray - how many? ;) just kidding... I just read your BLOG!)

- An opportunity...
... to possibly confront a friend. However, with this comes much discernment and prayer before any action are taken. I'm learning how to hear God speak through this experience, and as hard as it may seem, I'm taking this as a learning opportunity.

- The Neighbourhood Starbucks
I'm not brainwashed by Starbucks... yet. :) But, I'm thankful for the one nearby my house, where I've had way too many memorable moments (and some not-so-great ones, like doing audit work until closing or studying). Catching up w/ Jess & Clary, the usual coffee chat w/ Mom, getting to know Ada (who led me to Mils, who led me to Em, etc...), the Starbucks crew (by that, I mean the baristas that work there who have allowed me to experience bits and pieces of their lives - unfortunately not behind the counter...), quiet moments to read, and many many more.

- Emily & Richie
I reacquainted with Emily a few months ago through my friend Mils. Emily was an old neighbour back in the Scarberia days... we went to the same elementary school together. I was classmates up until grade 4 with Richie, her younger brother. This past Sunday, I had a chance to have lunch w/ them, and I caught up w/ the old times - finding out where my old classmates have gone, and how life has been for Em & Richie. Also had a chance to reacquaint w/ Em and Richie... it was awesome! I've been blessed as it is hard to find friends from the past. I'm looking forward to getting to know them even more as time passes.

- Other long time friendships
Can't believe it's been almost 7 or 8 years since I've met some of my high school friends; over the weekend, I found out one of the girls is getting married this year (wedding count up to 3 now!). Looking back, it's awesome to have shared this transition with this group of friends, even though we're not the tightest group of friends (due to distance, etc.)... at least we still keep in touch, catch up every two months, and share w/ each other our bigger moments in life. :)

- My other "family"
Although they are planning to take a family portrait sans moi, I'm still privilege to be welcomed to their home almost all the time, and use their kitchen as if it were my own. I still have the claim to the shed. :)

There are many more... but it's a bit past my bedtime, so I must get going. In the meantime, think of things YOU are thankful for, and perhaps share? Comment box is always available.

2006-02-05T23:10:00.000-05:00

Thought I'd share w/ you a picture of my creation... :) They're apparently edible. No one has complained to me about being sick yet... so I take that as a good sign. Next on my to-bake list... more cookies. Hopefully next weekend won't be like this weekend... in terms a baking-free wkend. PS - I promise for a longer blog next time.

2006-01-29T22:46:00.000-05:00

Weekend Recap

Originally, I planned on blogging about lessons I learned this past weekend... but with the desire to end this weekend on a high note, I am opting for another light, fluffy, and totally random blog. :)

- So... I'm torn. In your opinion, what should I get?
this and/or this. With the latter one, I'm referring to both the donna hay book, and the "great buy" recommendation for the nigella lawson book. AHHHHHHH!
- I'm also sick. This meant not being able to go dine at Mariko w/ my other "family".
- Time is sooooo short. There were many things I wanted to do this weekend, including writing letters, journaling, cleaning my room, watching old dvds... I got nothing accomplished. At least I baked for some friends :)
- In the midst of busy season, I have found something that's keeping me going... researching! for what? allow me to introduce you to the world of lonely planet and ng traveler. Can't wait... and potentially with great company!
- My parents never cease to amuse me. Funny stories include my mom dressing like a see lai (which is extremely rare), and dad joining the ymca.
- Baking is fun... even better w/ good company like Jess.

Anyway seeing that I should be in bed cos I'm sick... and I still am aiming to go to work tomorrow... I should get going. Perhaps a picture blog next time? If my computer wasn't so slow, I would've posted some baking pictures for your delight... and by that, I mean delight in laughing at my attempt to bake macaroons.

Ciao :)

2006-01-25T23:49:00.000-05:00

lots of thoughts have been on my mind lately... deeper thoughts than the ones you see here on this blog. unfortunately, i haven't had time and/or the energy to blog the deeper thoughts as of late. on the verge of getting sick too.

however, i've been slowly becoming more domesticated as each day passes. first i baked cookies. now i'm onto bigger things - brownies. made them from scratch too! how they turned out was another story. my coworkers had some and are seemingly fine. my next goal - learn how to make a good cup of cappucino. if only i understood the instruction manual.

someone once suggested a good and essential must have cookbook... the joy of cooking. did anyone here (meaning you, my dear reader) suggest that? please let me know... cos i'm suffering from memory loss these days too. (we'll save that topic for another day) any other good essential cookbooks to have for baked goods AND good food?

this interest of mine is not coming at a good time though. i realize i only have one month until convocation & fancy black-tie dinner... meaning i have to wear a dress. gaaaaaaaaaaah. on the bright side, at least i get to go to convocation! :) praise Him.

anyway, the neo-citran is slowly taking over my alertness, so i am signing off. 'til next time.